ELOPEMENT VS WEDDING?
Not sure if you want to have a big wedding or an elopement? You’re not alone! I hear this all the time from couples, and it’s totally normal to feel torn between the two. Many couples dream of an intimate ceremony with their partner but also want to celebrate with family and friends—it’s such a special decision to make! That’s why I’ve put together this blog to help guide you through the process and hopefully make the choice a little easier and exciting for you!
WHAT IS AN ELOPEMENT?
Traditionally, an elopement referred to a couple running away to get married in secret, often without the approval or knowledge of their families. It usually involved a quick, spontaneous ceremony, often at a courthouse or another discreet location, with minimal or no guests present.
Today, the meaning of elopement has evolved. While it still captures the spirit of an intimate and personal wedding, it no longer implies secrecy or haste. Modern elopements are often planned, intentional events where couples choose to focus on their connection rather than hosting a large traditional wedding. Many couples now elope in scenic destinations—beaches, mountains, or cityscapes—with just a few close friends or family members, or sometimes just the two of them. It's become a way to strip back the wedding experience to what feels most authentic for the couple, often prioritizing adventure, personal values, and experiences over traditional wedding formalities.
The day truely is yours, what makes you you, what is important & special to you.
WHAT WOULD YOU CALL A “WEDDING”?
A "wedding" is traditionally defined as a formal ceremony where two people come together to celebrate their commitment to one another, often in the presence of family and friends. It typically involves a series of rituals or customs, such as vows, rings, and speeches, depending on cultural or religious traditions.
But beyond the formalities, a wedding is essentially a celebration of love and partnership, where the couple declares their union and begins a new chapter in their lives together. It’s an event marked by joy, community, and reflection on the couple’s journey, often followed by a reception with food, music, and festivities.
That said, weddings can take many forms—from grand celebrations with hundreds of guests to intimate gatherings. At its core, a wedding is a meaningful event designed to honor the bond between two people in a way that feels authentic to them.
DIFFERENCE IN PRICE?
The cost difference between a wedding and an elopement can be significant, largely because traditional weddings involve more elements—guests, venues, catering, and decor—that drive up expenses.
(Note: These numbers reflect averages from various studies and are not a requirement for your wedding)
Traditional Wedding Costs:
Average Cost: A traditional wedding can range from $20,000 to $50,000+.
Venue: $10,000 - $15,000
Catering: $5,000 - $10,000 (depending on guest count)
Photographer/Videographer: $8,000 - $15,000
Dress/Attire: $2,000 - $4,000
Hair & Makeup: $1500+
Flowers/Decor: $2,000 - $5,000
Other (music, officiant, invitations, etc.): $1,000 - $5,000+
Elopement Costs:
Average Cost: Elopements typically range from $2,000 to $20,000, depending on destination and preferences.
Travel and Accommodation (for the couple and small guest list, if any): $1,000 - $5,000
Attire: $500 - $4,000
Hair & Makeup - $500
Photographer/Videographer: $2,000 - $8,000
Other (permit fees, personal decor, meal, etc.): $500 - $2,000
Key Differences:Guest Count: The biggest factor is the number of guests. A traditional wedding can have 50-200+ guests, while an elopement often involves just the couple, a few guests, or no guests at all.
Venue & Catering: A traditional wedding requires a larger venue and catering, whereas an elopement is often held outdoors or in smaller, more intimate spaces.
Travel: If the elopement is at a destination, travel can increase the cost, but it's still often far less than the total for a full-scale wedding.
In short, elopements generally cost a fraction of a traditional wedding, with the average wedding being 3-5 times more expensive than a typical elopement.
WHAT’S MOST IMPORTANT TO YOU?
There is a few things you can consider when deciding if you want to elope or have a big wedding, so I have written below a few questions to ask yourself that might answer the question for you.
1. What do you envision for your big day?
Do you picture an intimate, quiet moment with just the two of you, or a large celebration surrounded by family and friends?
2. How important is the presence of family and friends?
Do you want your loved ones to witness your vows, or would you prefer a private, more personal experience?
3. How much stress are you willing to handle in the planning process?
Are you excited about organising a big event, or does the idea of managing guest lists, vendors, and details feel overwhelming?
4. What’s your budget?
Would you rather allocate your budget toward a larger wedding with all the trimmings, or spend less on a simple elopement and possibly splurge on experiences like travel?
5. What kind of atmosphere do you want on your day?
Do you imagine a grand, formal celebration with lots of traditions, or a relaxed, low-key day where you can focus solely on each other and have a nice intimate dinner?
6. What feels more authentic to you both as a couple?
Is a big wedding the kind of experience that reflects your personalities, or would a more spontaneous or adventure-filled elopement feel truer to who you are?
7. How important are traditions to us?
Are there specific cultural, religious, or family traditions that are important for you to include? Would these be better honoured in a traditional wedding or can they be incorporated into an elopement?
8. How do you want to spend your wedding day?
Do you want to spend the day mingling with guests and hosting a large event, or would you prefer to spend it intimately together, exploring a beautiful location?
9. How do you feel about compromise?
If you go with a larger wedding, are you prepared to make compromises to accommodate others’ expectations? Or, if you elope, are you comfortable with potentially disappointing family or friends who won’t be there?
10. What matters most to you about this experience?
Is it having a fun celebration with your closest loved ones, or is it simply making your commitment to each other in a meaningful setting, with fewer people and less pressure?
11. How flexible do you want to be with the timeline?
A wedding day usually has a structured timeline for ceremony, photos, and reception. Would you enjoy that level of structure, or prefer the freedom to go at your own pace during an elopement?
12. What will you cherish most when you look back on your day?
When you think about your wedding day years down the road, what moments or feelings will be most important to remember? Does a big celebration or a private, intimate moment feel more meaningful?
CAN YOU HAVE BOTH?
Absolutely, you can definitely have the best of both worlds! If you're feeling torn between a wedding and an elopement, there's no reason why you can't enjoy a bit of both. Imagine starting your journey with a private, intimate ceremony—just the two of you, maybe in a stunning location that means something special, like a mountaintop, a secluded beach, or even your favorite city. This way, you get to soak in the moment, focused on each other without any distractions.
Then, once you've had your magical elopement, you can return to celebrate with your family and friends. Whether it’s a laid-back backyard party, a formal dinner, or a fun reception, you can design the event exactly how you want. It could even be a post-elopement brunch or a big evening bash with dancing and speeches. You get the intimate experience of an elopement, and still enjoy the fun and excitement of celebrating with your loved ones.
This approach gives you the freedom to have those quiet, meaningful moments while still sharing the joy with everyone who’s important to you.
Previous couples have even had a 2-day elopement/wedding. Day 1 you spend with your fiance/husband eloping, having a private dinner and enjoying each others company. Day 2 they spent with family, having some dinner and celebrating, this was nice for both parties because they were both involved.
ADVANTAGES OF AN ELOPEMENT:
Intimacy and Focus on the Couple
Eloping allows the focus to be entirely on the couple, free from distractions or expectations from guests. It creates a deeply personal and private moment shared between just the two of you.Less Stress and Pressure
Planning an elopement is typically much simpler and less stressful than organizing a traditional wedding. There are fewer logistics, no guest list drama, and no need to manage large groups of people.Cost-Effective
Eloping can be significantly less expensive, as you’ll save on big-ticket items like a large venue, catering for many guests, and elaborate decor. This leaves room to invest in experiences or travel.Flexibility and Freedom
Elopements give you the freedom to choose an unconventional location or time of year without worrying about accommodating others. You can elope in a beautiful remote destination or at a meaningful spot with little planning restrictions.Adventure and Spontaneity
Elopements are often more adventurous, allowing you to combine your wedding day with an exciting experience like hiking, traveling to a far-off destination, or exploring a place you’ve always dreamed of visiting together.Immediate Gratification
Eloping allows you to marry when you feel ready, without waiting months or years for a traditional wedding. You can act on your emotions and get married quickly, making the experience feel even more meaningful and spontaneous.
ADVANTAGES OF A WEDDING:
Celebrating with Family and Friends
A traditional wedding allows you to share the joy of your big day with your loved ones, creating lifelong memories with family and friends who are there to support and celebrate your union.Traditions and Rituals
Weddings often involve meaningful cultural, religious, or family traditions that may be important to you and your families. It’s an opportunity to honor and celebrate these customs in a more formal setting.Big, Festive Atmosphere
Weddings are often seen as once-in-a-lifetime events, complete with a lively atmosphere, music, dancing, and a party that brings people together. If you love the idea of throwing a big celebration, a traditional wedding is perfect for that!Memorable Moments with Guests
You’ll have the opportunity to create special moments with your guests, from the ceremony to the reception, speeches, first dances, and more. These moments can be cherished for years to come.Photographs and Videos with Loved Ones
A traditional wedding gives you the chance to capture memories not just between you and your partner but with all the important people in your life. Group photos, candid moments, and videos from the event will serve as cherished keepsakes.A Sense of Togetherness
Weddings often bring together family members and friends who may not gather often. It can be a rare opportunity to unite everyone in one place to witness your commitment to each other.
IF YOU DECIDE TO ELOPE, IT IS YOUR CHOICE
If you decide to elope, it’s entirely your choice, and that’s something truly special. I know it can be a tricky decision for many couples when choosing between eloping or having a traditional wedding. It’s not always as simple as saying, “we’re eloping” and then taking off. Family, friends, and loved ones play an important role in our lives, and making this choice can feel challenging because of the connections and expectations that come with it.
But here’s the thing—your wedding day is about you two. It’s about celebrating your love in a way that feels right for you, whether that’s in front of a large group or in an intimate, private setting. Eloping doesn’t mean excluding the people you care about; it just means choosing a moment that’s focused solely on your connection. You can always find ways to include family later, whether through a post-elopement celebration, sharing photos, or hosting a small gathering when you return.
At the end of the day, your choice to elope is a reflection of how you want to experience this beautiful moment in your lives. So, if eloping feels right, trust that it's okay to follow your hearts. Family will understand because, ultimately, they want to see you happy.
